Deciding whether to continue or end a romantic relationship is one of the most impactful decisions we can make, a decision that affects our longevity, quality of life, economic prospects and community. It’s no wonder such a momentous decision requires careful consideration, and is so often explored in therapy. In contemporary society, freedom from the rigid norms and sanctions of previous generations means each of us is expected to establish, maintain and dissolve relationshi

The process of choosing a therapist can be daunting. From the outside, therapy can seem secretive and difficult to understand. Is the perfect therapist like a doctor—specialised, authoritative and in control? Or stereotypically warm, welcoming and empathetic? What about the overwhelming number of technical terms? Which school, technique or approach should one choose? Schools and techniques On the question of therapy schools and technique, research has shown that the specific

Trauma responses often bring clients to therapy due to their intensely distressing and recurring nature. The foundations of a trauma response are laid in past events, though it’s a common misconception that trauma is linked to singular, impactful tragedies. It’s repeated feelings of uncontrollable fear that are the cause, not the events themselves. Any feeling of intense fear and lack of safety can pave the way for a trauma response, becoming increasingly likely if the experi

When I started psychotherapy training, I was perplexed by the sheer number of approaches. For a relatively young discipline—it’s been less than 150 years since the publication of Freud’s The Interpretation of Dreams —there are hundreds of named theories, a daunting number for a trainee or prospective client to wrap their heads around, let alone choose from. Rather than contradicting or muddling one other, I believe the various theories—gathered under umbrellas such as behavio

I have met clients who, convinced of my authority, sit patiently in our session, awaiting their fate. As they see it, my qualifications, title and role in society determine the power of my beliefs. They may be surprised to learn I have no interest in perpetuating hierarchical systems. The work of therapy is to midwife a client's inner authority, built on truth and experience. For most, the idea of an inner authority sounds frightening, perhaps even dangerous. At heart, many b